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Using "reverse psychology" to get children to do what you want them to do may work in the short-term but it has the potential to create a much bigger problem later.  For example, if you say things like "Don't you eat that!" to get your child to finish his dinner, or "Don't put that toy in the toybox!" to get her to pick up her things, you are actually encouraging defiant behaviors.  In the long-term using such strategies may send a message that doing the opposite of what a parent wants is acceptable.

Empathy is an important strategy for parents to utilize with their children.  A child needs to know you understand what he or she is experiencing or feeling.  Saying "I would feel angry too if my brother didn't want to share with me!" can send the message of support, understanding and acceptance.  Emphatic statements can also lead to opportunities for parents to teach your child skills necessary to effectively express and cope with emotions.

Going to public places with children can be a real challenge.  Top make the trip as successful as possible, plan ahead.  Prepare your child by telling them where you will be going, what is the goal or point of the trip, what you expect of them, and what will happen if they misbehave.  Once you have prepared your child, stick to what you told her.  Also, avoiding trips when you child is tired or hungry will help decrease irritability and frustrations.

Electronic media such as TV, video games, and the internet have become a regular part of most families' lives.  These outlets can be incredibly beneficial for education and entertainment.  However, they can also contribute to family difficulties.  Parents must be aware of what their children are viewing, as what children see can affect their behaviors.  For example, media access without limits can decrease a child's motivation to engage in other activities or encourage them to engage in undesirable or aggressive behaviors.

Parents often try to fix or solve problems their children experience.  However, parents need to teach their children to problem-solve by engaging them in the process.  When your child has experienced a dissappointment such as accidentally breaking a favorite toy, you can say, "I see you are disappointed.  What can you do to feel better?"  You may be surprised by the honest, creative and positive solutions she may suggest.

Say "I Love You" daily in a variety of ways to your child.  Put a note in herlunch bag.  Ruffle his hair as you walk past him.  Give her a smile and a wink in a crowd.  Make his favorite meal.  Show your love in ways that say "I am glad you are a part of my life."  When parents take the time to do small gestures, children often reciprocate.

To decrease frustration for both parent and child, be sure you are giving clear and specific commands to children.  Avoid saying things like, "Behave!" or "Knock it off!"  Instead, say say, "Sit on the couch.  Do not jump."  When youa re specific, you are helping children learn your expectations for them as well as effective communication skills.

Sibling rivalry can be typical in families.  Having children "race" to see who gets their teeth brushed first may be the first step to creating and maintaining sibling rivalry.  Parents can help decrease rivalry by not engaging children in competitionbetween one another.  Parents can also engage their children in problem-solving ways the siblings can get along with one another or allow one another some personal space.

The love of country and patriotism is a traditional American value.  Parents can help instill such values in their children by studying history with their children about how the events of history helped to shape their lives today.  Remembering to keep the interactions fun and age-appropriate for your child is essential for this to be a family success and not a torturous event for parents and children.

Use music as a way of connecting with your children.  With younger children, make up songs to teach new skills like brushing teeth or picking up shoes.  With School age children, use music as a tool for school; for example, states and capitals could be set to the tune of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.  With 'tweens and teens, get them talking about the music they like by asking open-ended questions.  When you ge the discussing how the music speaks to them personally, you can learn a great deal about your child.  Avoid statements that are judgmental or condescending to make these discussions successful.

Build a positive relationshiop with your child by showing empathy.  Webster's Dictionary defines empathy as "intellectual or emotional identification with another."  In other words, let them know you "get it", you know where they are coming from, and you would probably feel the same way too.  By normalizing feelings for kids, you are often able to diffuse a great deal of their resistance.  How can they fight you when you are saying they have every right to feel the way they do. 

Encourage positive thoughts and feelings about school.  Children can often pick up on a parent's feelings about school and incorporate them into their own opinions.  If you talk about hating math, your child may begin to complain about it as well.  If you comment about the teacher's "attitude", the child may begin to disregard whatever the teacher has to say, or even become disrespectful.  Instead, remain positive in your comments and discussions.  Focus on effort and persistence during difficult subjects and homework assignments...even if math is you least favorite subject!.